“I slept in today, because that’s certainly my way. No need for a checklist, I execute my plan. All I need is a ticket in hand, and I’m off to see the elder of Lost Lands.”
Mr. Monger is coming to town, and I’d like to wake up early for Excision. As it turns out, I did not. I had good reasoning! Jeff ‘Excision’ Able is coming to Chicago, and he’s debuting Nexus, the newest installment to connect with his headbanging legions. I can’t just show up and not be well rested. I mean, I can, and I have. Sleep, or no sleep, bruh, I’m a professional. When Excision calls, I answer. He needs Bear Swiftly in the crowd, he’s gettin’ Bear Swiftly in the crowd, you feel me? Let me delineate how this evening’s entertainment carried on.
“Once I’m awake, I thank heaven’s sake. No time to lag, best pack a bag. Why? It’s time to catch the Exxxcision show, time to headbang with all my exxxcentric sisters and bros. You know exxxactly what I’m saying, as you practice it too. You and I, my friend, are part of the same crew. Members of the same tribe, cool creatures, high five! Dancing, singing, and celebrating throughout our lives. Collaborating for moments of exxxcellence, worthy of our drives.”
I get to Navy Pier around 4:45pm, but I don’t actually get into the venue until a shade after 5:15. Parking. On-site lots are filled, so I find a garage a little ways away for $36. Meh. It’s Chicago. You gotta pay a little extra for whatever good time you wanna have, am I right? Imma get inside, and take a walk nearly all the waaayyy to the back of the complex, to clock in for my shift.
For those that don’t know, Navy Pier sponsors family entertainment. They have a Ferris wheel, so it makes sense why they’re hosting Excision in the Festival Hall. I truck through much of the interior, past unsuspecting stemma and systems of lineage, completely clueless of the debauchery in which fellow headbangers and I are set to engage. However, Excision cares about families. This holiday season, he’s giving the gift of message and mood, to support happy headbangers expanding their brood, if they possess the giving attitude. Thanks, Jeff, you’re certainly a cool dude.
The Festival Hall is cavernous, and well suited to host several armed forces. Plenty of space for headbangers to enjoy their favorite activity; hyperextended head banging, neck breaking, vibrational breathing exercises. After a quick and painless entry, especially for those without a bag, I’ve completed my primary objective of getting inside. There’s a dividing wall betwixt the hall. Survey says bathrooms, merchandise, and vendors on one side. Bars, platforms, and performances on the other. Dogma’s dubstep patterns encourage me forth momentarily before Lizzy Jane takes over.
Lizzy Jane is an interesting performer, and I would describe her set as non-traditional, authentic, and honest. Apparently, she’s a Christmas freak. Y’know that Mariah Carey track, “All I Want for Christmas Is You”? She drops a touchingly sweet remix of said song. Honestly, it’s the first Christmas jingle I’ve heard all season, and it leads into a remix of “All the Things She Said” by t.A.T.u. Next, Lizzy inquires if we enjoy drum and bass. Aww, how sweet! Mr. Monger doesn’t, but I sure as hell do. Please, continue how you see fit, delightful young lady. Pretty and polite, with plenty of energy and bounce, and that’s how I’m feeling about Ms. Jane before she drops a DnB remix of Hannah Wants, “Rhymes”.
Lizzy ends with an original of her own titled, “Heartbreak”. It serves a somber moment of reflection. I’ve been there before, and so have many of you. Rejection and sadness, all part of life. However, these sensations don’t last long. It’s Christmas season, a time of gratitude, so here comes Emorfik transmuting the energy in the room, calling our spirits to readiness for mosh pit activities. We’re fighting demons, and grooving with gusto. Noice!!! He’s a harbinger for the rest of the night’s entertainment. Kick it into overdrive, homie, my heart’s done bleeding.
Emorfik drops a collab he created with Sullivan King, and it coincides with a slide that reads, “Feel Angry Now?” I hadn’t even considered the notion, at all, before this point. Am I an angry bear? Maybe, although I highly suspect I’m having a great time. This brawling, bruising music amps myself and the rest of my compatriots into near frenzy, by speaking vigorously to our souls. Emorfik’s shouting again, and encouraging us to smile, before burying the next sequence of sonic slashes sweetly into eagerly awaiting sensory systems.
From a distance, my optics catch buckles dangling from his shirt, and it looks like Emorfik’s wearing a darkly colored straight jacket. Asylum games, I play these everyday. Who let the psycho loose? Half-joker, half-scarecrow, all mental. Sound like a familiar description? We might as well be reflections in a fun-house full of mirrors. A little bit villainous, completely anti-hero. Emorfik brings the tempers in the hall right where they need to be.
Before relinquishing control to Crankdat, Emorfik imbues us with some well-meaning guidance: “Never give up on yourself” and “Go for it”. Thanks buddy, you’re alright. Crankdat says hello, and starts with the second and final Mariah Carey remix I’ll hear tonight. Then it’s right back to slaying demons. Yes sir! That’s our business up in Navy Pier, this evening. We’re protecting families. You know Sullivan King is a father, right? Yup. He notifies us we’ll be paying for his therapy, for years to come. Thus, me and my crew of homies, whether together or apart, are making it tough for evil to take over. Or perhaps, the dark side has always been our home. The light may encourage many to step forth with their best, but the shadows harbor us, irregardless of what forms we inevitably take.
Before I continue, I’d like to identify a couple of the things I was very happy to hear and see: drum and bass (everybody’s doing it), and people throwing away their trash. I’m about that life. It’s super cool to see the kids picking up after themselves. However, there weren’t enough trash cans, and by the time Sullivan King takes the stage, most are filled beyond the brim. That’s one of the things I always want more of, a plentiful supply of rubbish receptacles for receiving refuse. Just because we’re getting saucy out here, doesn’t mean we don’t want to help clean up a little bit.
I’d also like to add, starting with Emorfik, the visual displays were impressive to behold. As Crankdat takes the stage, they elevate upwards even further. I witness a unique visual tactic for directing mosh pit activities. A series of clips declaring said activity is preparing to commence, complete with visual aids instructing proper conduct, stance, and positioning. Guided interactive audience. It’s a unique way of accomplishing the objective. Then, the lasers officially come to life.
It’s funny, to me, how positive and negative something can be, simultaneously. The simple fact that something exists, to positively or negatively persist, is, in its own way, remarkable. Nature changes. Even anger has a purpose. It’s an outlet, a venting. We’re all going to die, so play some music and let’s let loose a little. One thing we all have in common in these shared spaces, besides death and taxes, is that we enjoy dance and music. Dance, music, dance. Some people like to sleep, which is, actually, very dope. Being well rested is super tight, totally out of sight! Mr. Monger decides to clock out early for slumber, just before Sullivan King begins to king the way only king Sullivan can.
Golly gee, it finally dawns on me: I’m at an Excision Christmas concert! Hilarious! Sullivan King concludes at 9:30pm prompt, providing fifteen minutes reprieve for denizens to stretch and prep for tonight’s final set. I’m good and ready to go, as I’ve been trucking laps around the arena over the past hour, just so you know. At 9:45pm, the moment of anticipation arrives with precision laced efficacy. With the entrance of X, visual displays access a new level of atmospheric awesomeness that’s a staple of Excision’s format. This fella spends a lot of money to make sure his optics are on point, and it feels like 10,000 lasers are drawing overhead as never before seen visuals grace the screen. W000T!!! He drops a remix of The Cranberries, “Zombie”, that feels like it has the entire hall singing, not to mention staples like “Rumble” intermingling with unheard Linkin Park and $uicideboy$ renditions.
X straight blasts until 10:53pm before the room goes dark. His crowd calls for one more song, so you know what ol’ Jeffy boy does? He gives an encore, in sequencing four more tracks. “F.Y.U”, into “Evolution”, bleeding into “Robo Kitty”, and finishing with the rallying cry of his forces, “Headbanga”.
You might as well call Excision, Santa Claus this Christmas season. Family entertainment, at Navy Pier, for all the adults and kids in assembly. Tonight served as the inaugural demonstration of his Nexus display, and based on my estimation, I’d say he’s got plenty of lasers and brand spanking new visual sequences to satisfy his faithful, and entice at least a few new fresh-faced recruits to join his ever-growing legions. Get some sleep, or don’t, just make sure you show up with a healthy attitude. In my humble opinion, that’s the best way to experience Excision. Being well rested is the gift that keeps on giving.
“The night’s entertainment was grand, with healthy portions of lasers, dubstep, and DnB satisfying all demand. From near and far, to and fro, we gathered for Exxxcision’s Exxxceptional Nexxxus show. To all, I gift you well wishes of gladness and cheer. Let us encourage the best of ourselves, and go forth optimally into the new year.”
Be well, be successful. Bear Swiftly.
–Electro Scribe–
